Author Archives: disabadillo

Why I Needed a Break…My Hiatus Explained

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Hi Beautiful!

If you didn’t already know, I took a break from writing/blogging for almost a year. I felt like it was something I needed to do. The Lord has been placing it on my heart to write again & my husband has also been encouraging me, but I have been fighting it. It’s definitely a battle between my flesh &  spirit. But here I am, my flesh lost.

So why was it such a battle? Why did I take a break? Why am I back now? Well these are questions I plan on answering with this post.

I have always loved to write. Blogging helped me overcome some of my own personal struggles & has helped others as well. I always felt like God wanted me to write for a reason. I never cared how big of an audience I reached, I just wanted to do my Father’s business & if only one life was changed in the process, I was happy with that. I still am happy with that.

This time last year, I was writing on this blog & for Marriedandyoung.com (definitely check out that site. It is a great resource for those who are married, engaged, or single). I felt like God was really opening up doors for me that I wasn’t even looking for. I was newly married & was writing about things that I learned along the way, things that I felt would help others who are married, engaged, or single. I was really on fire for Christ. But that started to fizzle out for me. I started to get attacked heavily. It seemed like I would get attacked on the very issue that I had just blogged about as soon as it was published.

I was writing about how to be a good wife/spouse & I was failing at it. I was providing all this wisdom for people to apply, but I couldn’t apply it myself. I felt like a failure, so I quit. I gave in. I told everyone else, that my schedule had just gotten too busy to be able to blog regularly, but truth be told, I was afraid. I was tired of failing these tests & getting attacked by the enemy, so I threw in the towel. I did exactly what the enemy wanted me to do. I began to resent God. I didn’t understand why He would increase my territory, my audience, just so I could fail. I didn’t see why He would provide me with so much insight & wisdom but not allow me to apply it myself. I blamed God. I withdrew from Him because I felt like I failed Him.

At the time, I felt like I had no one to turn to or talk to, not even God. After all, I am blogging about being a great spouse & how to have a great marriage, but I felt like I was not living up to this perfect standard that I had created in my head or that people had created for me. I felt like a fake, a hypocrite. I didn’t feel worthy to write anymore. I felt ashamed & alone. So I stopped. I never gave it much thought. I never thought I would want to write again. I was okay with not writing again. But as I opened up to those around me, my walls began to fall. My shame began to disappear. My relationship with Christ began to grow again. I realized, it wasn’t Him. It was ME.

I allowed the enemy to win. I KNEW the attacks were going to come, but I did nothing to prepare. I gave in every time. I didn’t want to take responsibility, but I do now. God revealed to me that He has a purpose for everything I’ve gone through, even the things I brought upon myself. He reassured me that I am built for this. That He didn’t bring me this far to leave. He reminded me that I am more than a conqueror & that with Him all things are possible. I was reminded to lean on His strength instead of my own.

I still don’t feel qualified to write or give advice or provide godly wisdom & encouragement, but I am reminded that God qualifies those He calls. Ester wasn’t qualified. Ruth wasn’t qualified. But they both did a mighty work for the Lord. I know I can too & so can you.

Whatever that “thing” is that you feel God is calling you to do that you don’t feel quite adequate or ready to do, remember that on your own, you probably aren’t, but with Him you can accomplish & do anything that He has called you to do. Don’t give up. Don’t lose hope.

Be encouraged 🙂

xoxo

Disa B.

From Rubbish to Rubies

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rubbish
I remember about 4 years ago, I was so broken. I was at my lowest point. The things I placed my hope in failed me. I had no self worth. I didn’t value myself. I accepted anything and everything from someone who didn’t deserve a hello from me.  I knew I should be treated well and that abuse is not acceptable, but in my mind I didn’t believe I deserved better or could get better. My heart ached as my mind played tricks on me. I had been belittled and ridiculed so much that I began to believe the things people who didn’t matter would say about me. I began to believe I was worthless, even if my mom said I was priceless. I began to believe that in order to keep that man, I had to open my legs, even though my parents taught me better. The enemy had a hold on me. I remember my life flashing before my eyes. I remember an ex telling me that he’s not afraid to die and pulling the emergency break while going at least 80 mph. I remember that truck narrowly missing my car after it spun around. I remember fearing for my life. I remember wondering why that truck didn’t hit us and why I didn’t get hurt or why I didn’t die.
 
Now I realize that even in my sin, God was fighting for me. He remembered the plans He has for me, plans for good and not for evil. He didn’t want me to stay on the path I was going. He wanted me back in His arms. He never wanted me to leave but I walked away. I was fighting God off of me as He was fighting for me. He never gave up. God fought relentlessly for me. I believe he fights relentlessly for you too.
 
imagesCAMFSGA1He doesn’t want His sons and daughters to live a hopeless life on a path of destruction that will ultimately send us to hell. He wants us to be His. He wants us to be whole. He wants us to choose Him. He wants us to choose Jesus, not the world. God says we are worthy no matter what mistakes we’ve made. God says we’re worth far more than rubies. He doesn’t remind us of the filthy rubbish we once laid in, that we once identified ourselves with. He turns our rubbish into rubies and uses our past mistakes, failures, disappointments, heartbreaks, insecurities, and pain to bring Him glory.
 
We all have a past. We all have made mistakes, but your rubbish doesn’t define you. God’s word does. And He says you are fearfully & wonderfully made. You are more precious than rubies. Let Him turn your rubbish into rubies for His name sake. If you are single, know that God loves and cares for you. He has a perfect plan for your life. You are worth the wait. Your singleness isn’t a punishment from God. It is a gift from Him. He longs for you. Allow Him to make you whole. If you are married and feel low, know that God hasn’t abandoned you. Look to Him to heal your wounds. Your spouse is great but he/she isn’t God. Allow God to fill your voids. I am praying for you!
 
xoxo Disa B.

Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

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Growing up, I had low self-esteem and a poor self-image. I didn’t like the way my nose was shaped or how my eyes looked.fearfully&wonderfullyI definitely did not like my hair. I desperately wanted to look like the girls on TV. I wanted to look in the mirror and see myself as beautiful instead of ugly. The older I got, the better I became at masking my low self-esteem with a false confidence I would pretend to have. I didn’t want people to know how I really saw myself, so I would portray myself as this cool, confident young woman who was so sure of herself and didn’t care what people thought of her. That was so far from the truth. On the inside, I was growing more insecure by the day. The only time I felt pretty was when I had a boyfriend. I let them determine how I saw myself. Whenever they would cheat on me and abuse me physically and/or mentally, I was back in a low, depressed state. I would immediately begin to see myself in a negative light. I would always believe I deserved to be mistreated because I felt I wasn’t good enough.  I would think, “If only I were prettier, he would treat me better…if only I had this or I had that, he would be faithful to me.” Eventually, I snapped out of that. Thank God! I fell to the feet of Jesus. He had been waiting on me for so long. He showed me my value. He showed me my worth. He showed me that I am beautiful, that I am made in His image. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. He showed me that my value, my worth, my esteem comes from Him, not from them.

If you are struggling with body image issues, low self-esteem, or low self-worth, please know and believe you are beautiful, worthy, and valuable. God says so, and He does not lie. You are made in His image. He loves you, and He cares for you. Go to Him, not to the fading things of this world.  Only He alone can change the way you see yourself, but YOU have to be willing. Jesus loves you, and so do I.

Remember: You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You were made in the image of God. If you have a poor view of yourself, you essentially have a poor view of God. Allow Him to change the way you view yourself. You are worth far more than rubies. Don’t let anyone else tell you differently.

xoxo Disa B.

Defeating Discouragement

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I am so excited. My husband has decided to be a guest writer on my blog! I recently wrote a post called “Feeling Discouraged” that not only encouraged me, but it encouraged him as well. I am so excited to share with you his perspective on discouragement. I pray it blesses you. It blessed me. God’s plan for your life is not for you to be constantly discouraged but to be encouraged. Cast down all those discouraging thoughts and feelings and make them be obedient to God’s Word! Enjoy the post below from my amazing husband! 

xoxo Disa B.

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At some point in our lives we have all dealt with the feeling of discouragement. Whether it’s not making the team, not getting the job, getting turned down for a date, etc. we all have experienced moments that just did not turn out the way we had planned or hoped for. Our initial reaction in these situations is to feel discouraged. Discouragement then affects our confidence and we may begin to doubt ourselves. This is devastating to us physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It’s at these moments that we leave ourselves vulnerable to the enemy because instead of exercising our faith and falling back on God’s promises for us, we tend to distance ourselves from God. We start pointing the finger at God and trying to take matters into our own hands. However, we are reminded in Proverbs 3:5-6 that we must “Trust in the Lord with all of [our] heart” and not to “depend on [our] own understanding.” Clearly put, we must trust God and know that He has a purpose for those moments instead of trying to make sense of everything.

So how does God feel about discouragement? Quite simply, He strongly opposes it. He commands us in Joshua 1:9 to “be strong and courageous!” And “not to be afraid or discouraged.” God did not make a request or give us an option, He clearly COMMANDED us to be strong and courageous. The verse ends with “For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” So going back to the moment we experienced that led to our discouragement, we can be reminded that God is with us regardless of the circumstances and we must continue to trust Him in those trying times. In those moments that we are filled with discouragement, we can look in the Bible as it is filled with verses that are encouraging and good for us. One is Deuteronomy 31:8 where Moses tells Joshua not to “be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.”

When going through a hard time don’t we usually feel comforted when our friends and family give us those pep talks? “Hey, it is going to be alright.” “There are other fish in the sea.” “There are bigger and better things for you.” We hear these all the time and eventually, over time, we start to feel better, and we do believe it.  We should find comfort in knowing that God is with us, and above all, we must trust Him. He is making a way, and we must be patient and not try to understand it all. Just trust that God has something better in store for us. Again, the Bible is filled with encouragement and it is important for us to inscribe the Word in our hearts. We become vulnerable when discouraged, and the Word of God is our weapon in this spiritual warfare against the enemy.

So, the next time discouragement finds its way into your life, remember that God commands us to be strong and courageous, to trust in Him and not to depend on our own understanding. God has a plan and a purpose and we have to let Him do His work. We can take that time to prepare for what God has in store for us and find peace in knowing that God is with us.

 

God Bless,

Darien B.

Feeling Discouraged?

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I know often times in life things don’t work out exactly how we wanted them to; our plans don’t pan out the way we expected. In those times, it is easy to get discouraged and easy to give up, but I want to urge you to not give up. Disappointment does not equal failure. Hearing a “no” does not mean you will never hear “yes”. If you give up now, you forfeit your promise. The enemy wants to steal, kill, and destroy. He wants to steal your joy and your hope. He wants to kill your dreams and passions. He wants to destroy the purpose God has for you. The enemy wants nothing more than to see you discouraged. To discourage means to dissuade or hinder; to deprive courage or confidence.  The enemy wants to take away your confidence in your purpose. He doesn’t want to see you fulfill the things God has destined for you. Just as he met Jesus in the wilderness to try to persuade Jesus that He didn’t need to fulfill the will of God after Jesus fasted for 40 days, the enemy wants to persuade you to not fulfill the will of God as well. He doesn’t want you to reach your promise land. He wants you to see closed doors as missed opportunities, not as provisions of God. He wants you to think you aren’t good enough, like you can’t fulfill your purpose, and that you don’t have the experience or resources needed to succeed. He will do anything to get you to quit. Discouragement is one of his tactics to get you to quit and unfortunately, a lot of us fall for it. But the good news is, we don’t have to.

discouragedJust as Jesus overcame the enemy’s tactics, so can we. All we have to do is fight back with the Word of God. That means we must first KNOW the Word and have it in our hearts. I would encourage you to memorize, study, and meditate on Scripture. It is the sword we use to fight back the enemy.

Knowing the Word of God also helps strengthen our faith and our confidence. There are thousands of promises in the Bible that still stand for us today and the Word of the Lord does not return void. If we remember these promises, we won’t believe the lies of the enemy when he tries to discourage us. God has promised you a future and a hope. His plans for you are good and not harmful. Don’t let your faith waiver because of your circumstances. Stand firm on the Word of God. Fight the enemy back. You already have the victory. You just have to believe it!

I pray this encouraged you. When you feel discouraged, pray. If you don’t know the words to say, just say Jesus. He will give you peace. He is the ultimate encourager. He will lift you up.

 

xoxo Disa B.

A Letter to the Lost Me

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Dear Lost Me,

You are somebody. You have been hurt. You have been ridiculed. You have been mocked. You have been taken for granted. Your name has been drug through the mud, but you can overcome. You will overcome. Your worth isn’t in that man who says you think you’re too much. Truth is, you are too much. You are set at a price that he couldn’t afford so he would try to do anything to devalue u. You are worth far more than rubies, don’t let anyone tell you differently. You are worth more than that man who chokes you and makes you fear for your life. You don’t deserve to be treated that way. You deserve so much more. You are beautiful. Why do you think you’re not? Sure you’ve been used and abused but that doesn’t define you. You are a queen. Your worth isn’t found in those girls you thought were your friends. I know you let them into your world and you trusted them. They prayed against what you were praying for. Don’t let them hinder your ability to be a friend. They were really a wolf in sheep’s clothing, pretending to care. That’s not you though…don’t let that experience turn you into that. You are kind, caring and compassionate. You don’t have to be a tough girl all the time. Sure you’ve been used and abused but that doesn’t define you. You made the grades, you had the scholarships…but you still feel empty because you placed your value and your worth in that. Those things are great but that doesn’t define you. The clubbing and the alcohol don’t define you. You use it to escape from reality but when the buzz wears off and you wake up the next day and you’re back in reality, you still feel empty and broken. This is not your solution…Jesus is.

One day you will realize just how valuable you are because you will realize Whose you are and THAT defines you. You are the daughter of The King. You are to die for…Jesus showed you that 2,000+ years ago. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Your past isn’t your future. Your past, your pain, your tears, your experiences will become your testimony and it will touch the lives of those around you. It will save people and bring them to Christ the same way your pain brought you to the feet of Jesus. See there is purpose in your pain. You won’t be down always. I know you’re feeling depressed right now and alone but I promise you this…you are not alone. You may feel lonely but Jesus is there. He is there to pull you out of that gruesome pit of depression that’s trying to pull you in deeper. He is there. Reach out to Him. Let Him save you. Surrender it all. When you do, I promise you will feel better. You will be able to smile again…I mean truly smile. You will radiate from a joy that comes from within. ImageAnd one day, at the right time, God will bring you someone who knows your worth and is willing the pay the price for you. One day you will be a wife and he will show you what God’s love looks like in a man. The enemy will try to make you think that this is too good to be true, but remember God says nothing is too good for you. Remember you deserve to be treated like the queen you are. You are worth so much more than you could ever imagine and this man will show you that because God first showed him. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life…He will heal you. He will make you new. Let Him. Don’t abort the process before you get to your promise. It will be hard. But it will be worth it. And one day you will sit back and say…”God You are so faithful. You turned my misery into ministry. You turned my pain into joy. There were times I had given up on myself but You never did. Thank You Lord.”

xoxo

An Improved Me

Knowing God vs. Knowing Of God

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It is so easy for us to think we know someone based on what we’ve heard about them or learned about them through the experience’s of others, but we don’t really know them. We haven’t gotten to know them one on one. We haven’t built a relationship with them. Our friends or relatives might have a relationship with someone and they may share with us bits and pieces of that relationship but we don’t have a relationship of our own with that person. For example, I went to a rather large high school. We had around 1,000 people per graduating class. I did not know everyone. I knew of a lot of people just like a lot of people knew of me. On my track team alone, I didn’t really know everyone and I was captain. For college, I went to a smaller school. I knew everyone on my track team. I had a relationship with them all rather big or small…I knew them. I know some better than others because I spent more time with them, but I can say I know them all.  

A person who doesn’t know me but knew of me and was asked about me might respond and say something like “Oh yea, I’ve heard about her. She ran track right. She dated so & so and went to HBU right?” They are just saying things that they have heard about me from other people, where as a person who truly knows me would say something like “Oh yea Disa. That’s my girl. We talk/hang out all the time. The Lord has truly worked in her life…etc” They can say these things with confidence because they KNOW me. 

I feel like growing up and just living life, we hear people say “God is good.” We hear them say “God can make a way out of no way, He is the beginning and the end, alpha and omega.” We hear them say, “Jesus is real. He is good. He is redeemer. He is savior” And then we just go on and repeat these things because that is what we have heard others say, but we haven’t experienced His goodness for ourselves. We don’t know Him as our redeemer, our healer, our savior. 

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Jesus wants you to know Him. He wants you to have a deep, intimate relationship with you. He wants you to experience Him for yourself. I can blog, tweet, Facebook, and Instagram about how good the Lord is but that won’t save you. When you encounter Jesus for yourself, you won’t leave the same. You won’t be the same. I remember my mom always talking about how good God is but I never really understood it until I experienced His goodness for myself. Until I got to know Him. Now I don’t just know of God, I actually KNOW Him! I have my own relationship with Him. Through Jesus, I know Him as my friend, my redeemer, my healer, my savior, my comforter. He is my way maker, my door opener (and closer). He is my Lord! 

ImageHow do we get to know God and build a relationship with Him:

  1. Accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior! “If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your hear that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved” – Romans 10:9. In order to begin to have a relationship with God, we have to be saved. The only way to get to The Father is Through Jesus.  “Jesus told Him: ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me” – John 14:6. Once you truly accept Him as Lord of your life, you will begin to see a change in yourself. You will begin to start looking more like Him. The process isn’t always going to be easy, and it will sometimes hurt, but it is all for your good and it will be well worth it.  
  2. Pray Often: Prayer is how we communicate with God. The Bible says to “Pray continually” in 1 Thessalonians. Praying doesn’t have to be so elaborate and complicated. Talk to God just like you would talk to a confidant here on earth. Tell him your hurts. Tell him how you feel. He wants to know the depths of your soul. Yes, He is all knowing so even if you don’t tell Him, He knows but He wants to know that you trust Him. He wants you to humble yourself and admit that you can’t do this thing called life without Him. He wants you to come to Him. He says “Come to me all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest” (Matt 11:28)
  3. Read His Word: The Bible is God speaking to us. He gives us instruction and wisdom in His Word. It is living. It is relevant in today’s world. It shows His heart. It shows His plans. It shows Him. We can’t truly know God is we don’t know His word.The great thing about God is He is always there when we need him. He doesn’t ignore our text messages, he doesn’t forward our calls to voicemail. He is there in our time of need. He gives us thousands of promises in the Bible. But we must read it in order to know what they are. And the good thing about those promises and His word is that it never returns void (Isaiah 55:11). 

I pray that today you begin to know Christ for yourself and not through the experiences of others. I found God and began to really know Him at my lowest point. He saved me from depression, feelings of worthlessness, and so many other things. I know God as my healer because I have experienced it. I know Him as my redeemer because He redeemed me. I know Him as my savior because He died for me 2,000+ years ago and died on a cross for me so that I might have eternal life in heaven but also because there are times I could have died, times I shouldn’t have made it…yet He saved me! 

My prayer is that you begin to know God for yourself. Just like you spend time getting to know someone new, spend time with God. He wants to know the ins and outs of you. We will spend all day on the phone getting to know our newest crush but can’t spend 30 minutes with God. He wants a relationship with you. It will be the best relationship you have ever experienced. I can promise you that! 

Jesus loves you.

I love you.

xoxo Disa B.

The “S” Word…Yep Submission

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Valentine’s Day is approaching, so I thought that I should write about a topic that can either make or break marriages. Submission. A lot of people, especially women, cringe at that word. Submission in marriage gets such a bad rep these days. I know some people abuse what submission is actually supposed to be, but in order to have a marriage God’s way, as women we must be willing to submit even if we feel our husbands aren’t doing their part. We tend to say “I’ll submit when he does xy&z”. Instead of doing that let’s focus on us and what we can do better. Allow your husband to see the God in you and allow God to work on him. A quiet, gentle spirit brings about change in your man way quicker than nagging ever could.

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Being a newlywed, I understand how hard it can be to submit to your husband. We have been taught to be independent and to speak our minds. Society says “It’s 2014…what do you mean I need to submit?” TV shows view submission as weakness. Everywhere you turn, you hear about how you don’t need to submit. But God’s Word remains the same no matter what people say, no matter how society changes, no matter what year it is. The Bible says that we are to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21). Reverence means “deep respect for someone or something.” So out of deep respect for Christ, we are supposed to submit to one another…that includes men submitting to their wives as well, but I will get to that later. Right now, I want to focus on women.

As women, we are called to submit to our husbands as unto the Lord (Ephesians 5:22). What I have learned is, we can’t submit to our husbands if we have never submitted to God. When I was single, I studied submission and the roles of a wife in biblical terms so that I could be ready when that day comes that I am a wife. I remember God saying, “How can you submit to your husband when you don’t even submit to me or your earthly father?” I remember it hit me hard. I never liked for people to tell me what to do, how to dress, how to wear my hair, or anything like that. I would rebel. God told me that if you rebel while you’re single, you will rebel while you’re married.  I needed that kick in the butt. How often do we disregard authority because we don’t agree to the rules? How often do we roll our eyes at our parents when they tell us to do things we don’t like? Submission starts long before you are married (that is for all my single people reading this). If you are married and are having a tough time with submission, it is okay. It is never too late to start.

So what does submitting to Christ look like?

Submitting to Christ is obeying God’s word. It is including Him in every aspect of your life. It is listening to those nudges and convictions He gives you. Submitting to Christ means respecting Him. This is also what submitting to your husband should look like because out of deep respect for Christ, we are to submit to our husbands as unto the Lord. Submission isn’t meant to degrade us as women. It isn’t meant to make us a slave to our man. Submission isn’t meant to be a bad thing. Humans can make it bad, but that is not God’s plan. Do not stand for abuse…EVER! That is not love. That is not what submission is. Period. If you are in an abusive situation, seek help. I promise that is not God’s plan for your life. You are worth so much more than that.

What submission comes down to is love and respect. Husbands need to love their wives and wives need to respect their husbands. When I see women disrespect their husbands and talk to them any kind of way, especially in public, my heart hurts. We all need affirmation but especially men. I see that man being emasculated each time his wife lays down the law. Allow your husband to lead you. That is his role as a man…as a husband. Can it be hard? Yes. But with God, ALL things are possible.

Ephesians 5-25This brings me to the men. The bible doesn’t only talk about women submitting. It says to submit to one another…so men have a role in submission too. Men submit to their wives by loving them like Christ loved the Church (Ephesians 5:25). You are one with your wife. You wouldn’t disrespect yourself or beat yourself or demean yourself…so don’t do it to your wife. Love her. Cherish her. She is your crown. She is your treasure. The bible says in Proverbs “He who finds a wife finds a good thing.” One translation says he who finds a wife finds a treasure. A treasure is precious. A treasure is to be handled with care. A treasure is your wife. She is your crown. Treat her as such. Don’t take your role as leader and abuse it. You should be your wife’s protector. She shouldn’t need protection from you.
I want to leave you with the The Message Translation of Ephesians 5:21-33. I hope it helps you. The Word is life changing if you let it change your life.

“Out of respect for Christ, be courteously reverent to one another. Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands. Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor—since they’re already “one” in marriage. No one abuses his own body, does he? No, he feeds and pampers it. That’s how Christ treats us, the church, since we are part of his body. And this is why a man leaves father and mother and cherishes his wife. No longer two, they become “one flesh.” This is a huge mystery, and I don’t pretend to understand it all. What is clearest to me is the way Christ treats the church. And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.” 

I love you all!
xoxoxo

Disa Badillo

Wife After God Review/Recap

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My number 1 goal for this year is to spend time with God everyday and to deepen my relationship with Him. I believe in doing so, I will then draw closer to my husband and be able to be the wife God has called me to be.

ImageI started this year off doing the Wife After God 30 day devotional. This devotional helped me understand how to be the wife God has called me to be. I already knew what he called me to do as a wife, but there were some areas where I struggled with the “how”. How do I be submissive even if I feel my way is better? How do I stay peaceful and patient when he is working my last nerve? How Lord? How?! I will be married for 2 months on February 14. Don’t get me wrong, I love being married. I love being a newlywed. We haven’t struggled with a lot of major things since becoming married, but I am a studier. I am a researcher. I want to be prepared when the storms do hit. I live in Houston and when its hurricane season, we are prepared. I feel that is how marriage should be handled. We don’t need to wait for the storm to get here to prepare…it’s often to late at that point. We must prepare in advance. I could write a whole nother blog about that and I might at some point, but this blog is about my Wife After God 30 day devotional journey.

Prior to getting married, Darien (my husband) and I took a marriage class. It was a class for engaged couples and married couples to make a good marriage/relationship great or a bad marriage/relationship good. I am happy we took the class prior to getting married instead of waiting 5 years when things are going horrible to take the class. That class showed us how to communicate. It showed us how to be on the same team and not be enemies. It showed us so many things that I think we will keep with us forever. While going through the Wife After God devotional, I noticed a lot of similarities between what I learned in our marriage class and what I was learning in the devotional. This devotional was such a great reminder.

Each day in the devotional, there are scriptures to read, a story relating to the scriptures and to marriage and a challenge. There were also journal questions to answer at the end of each day. I absolutely loved that it was interactive and that it allowed God to show me what I needed to work on. This devotional touched on real issues that marriages face daily. It talked about intimacy, and the parts of marriage, praying for your marriage, praying for your husband, praying for yourself, God’s purpose for marriage, and so much more. I would totally recommend this to those who are engaged, happily married, married, divorced, or separated. I promise it won’t disappoint. We often want to blame others for the wrongs that happen in our lives and we often want to blame our spouse for the wrong that has happened in our marriage. This devotional makes you look within and see what it is you can do to change and what you can do to make your marriage better.

While doing this devotional, the author (Jennifer Smith) and tons of other women were doing it at the same time. Jennifer, who is also the founder of UnveiledWife.com, setup a Facebook group for everyone who was interested in doing the devotional and would post questions and youtube videos explaining each devotional each day. The women in this group were so transparent. My heart broke for some marriages and my heart celebrated with other marriages when they triumphed and made breakthroughs in their marriage. I would definitely suggest doing this devotional with other women and discussing the content with them and hold each other accountable.

Now, my favorite part of the devotional was the last day. The final challenge is to write a love letter to your husband or if you aren’t married, to your future husband. Men need affirmation…we all do but men especially. We tend to tell them everything they do wrong and everything they need to work on, but we don’t tell them as often as we should how appreciated they are and how loved they are and how wonderful they are. In the letter, you can spill it all out and make it as creative as you want it to be, as romantic as you want it to be, as quirky as you want it to be….you get to make it your own. This is something I challenge everyone to do. If you are a man, write a letter to your wife or future wife. If you are a woman, write a letter to your husband or future husband. Valentine’s Day is coming up…I am sure that would be a great gift or addition to a gift for your significant other.

This devotional can be bought on Amazon as a paperback or you can purchase the Kindle version. I highly recommend it!

xoxo

Disa Badillo