When I gave birth to my son, I planned on doing it medication free and having a wonderful natural delivery. That was not the case. I blogged about it here. I knew that whenever I had my next child, I wanted a better experience. I would be better prepared. I’d be more confident and be in charge of my birth experience…not the nurses or my doctor. I prayed that God would allow me to have a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) and He did!

When I found out I was pregnant, I immediately started researching doctors that would attempt VBACs. Apparently a lot of doctors won’t do it due to a small risk factor where there is a small percent chance that your uterus could rupture. But there are risks in repeat cesareans as well so I didn’t let that scare me. After researching & researching, I found my doctor and I’m so glad I chose her! I originally chose another doctor but wasn’t going to be able to be seen by that doctor for a long time because all appointments were booked (Thanks to all these hurricane babies people were popping up pregnant with 😂) so I chose another doctor instead who turned out to be the right choice for me! God is always working!

So after meeting with my doctor and telling her my plan of VBAC and her reviewing my history and my cesearean operative report, she said she thinks I’m a perfect candidate! That was music to my ears! So from that moment on, I started my game plan. My husband and I prepped and prepared and studied and were on the same page about what I wanted. He was my daddy Doula and we were going to conquer this thing to have the birth experience I wanted.

So fast forward to my labor:

My early labor lasted a long time. I went in for my 37 week checkup on July 19th (I was 37 weeks 2 days). She checked my cervix and I was 3cm dilated, over 50% effaced and Baby girl was in +2 position. My doctor was so surprised with my progress and knew I wouldnt make it to my due date of August 7. I left there feeling excited and anxious. My mom had gotten in town the Friday before and came to the appointment with me. She was just as ready as me to have the baby, but i didn’t want to get my hopes up. I was 3 cm dilated with my son for 3 weeks before he came, so I tried not to think about it.

That Saturday (7/21) and Sunday (7/22), I started having Braxton Hicks contractions but they were a little strong but irregular so I knew something was changing. I was hydrated and I hadnt had any leading up to this point. I figured my early labor had officially begun. I had a Skype call on Monday for work (7/23) where I was leading the call and told them, I’ll probably have a baby today or tomorrow. I just felt different. That night, the Braxton Hicks started feeling stronger and were coming closer together trying to create a pattern. At that point, I told my husband to come home from work because I think tonight is the night and since he is my Doula, I need him with me. He came home, showered and was there being my support. I told him that we should head to the hospital. We did. Once we got in triage, I was still only 3cm dilated and my contractions kept dying off. They suggested we walk. So we did that twice! Walked for 2 hours, 2 different times and I still wasn’t progressing. We decided to go home. It was about 5am on 7/24 at this point, and I was feeling defeated. I had made my husband leave work early and the baby isn’t even here. I just knew she was coming. My husband was so encouraging and told me not to feel defeated (I never told him how I was feeling but I did start crying) and that it was all going to be fine.

So we get home and I go to sleep, it felt like as soon as I fell asleep, I was awoken by some crazy contractions. This was around 7am. At this point I knew, this is real and I’m forreal in labor because nothing was helping the pain. I got up and went to the toilet. It felt better to labor there. Then that stopped working. I got up and walked around, leaned on chairs and the wall and things in the closet. Then my daddy Doula suggested laboring in the bath tub, and I’m so glad he did. I labored in there for a while. Then my husband said, it’s time to go back to the hospital. It took me like an hour and a half to get dressed because I kept stopping at each contraction due to the pain. I also tried to eat something as well because I knew I’d need that fuel. So around 10:30am we were off to the hospital!

The drive was brutal. Contractions in the car with bumps and stops etc. are no bueno. But we finally made it to the hospital! When we made it to triage this time, I was immediately checked and to my relief I was 6cm dilated. I was in so much pain. I immediately said (well loudly proclaimed), “I NEED the epidural! Can I get it now?” The nurse responded that once I get a room in labor and delivery and they monitor me and the anesthesiologist is able to come to my room, I will be able to get the epidural. In my head, I am thinking that the baby will be here by then! I could tell they were rushing to get me down to labor and delivery. At this point, I am losing it. I am not staying on top of my contractions and being calm. I am drowning in them and losing control. My husband is calmly telling me to breathe and telling me I can do this while I am telling him that I can’t. I finally make it to L&D and the anesthesiologist comes not too long after.

Intially, I was not going to get an epidural at all, but 2 things changed for me. One was the pain, I was not able to regain control and I had lost it. I was crying and just a wreck. The second thing was that since I was attempting a VBAC, the nurses let me know that in the event I did have to have a c-section and didn’t have an epidural already, I would be put to sleep during the procedure. That was something I did not want at all. So I made it to 7/8 cm without the epidural and I was darn proud of myself for that and was ready to get the epidural. The doctor said it would take 20 minutes for it to take effect. I immediately thought “well what the heck is the point?! I need it now!” So like I said, my game plan going in was to never get the epidural to begin with and God remembered that so even after the 20 minute wait, He didn’t allow it to take full effect but allowed me to have it for my peace of mind in the event of an emergency c-section. So, I could still feel every contraction and the pressure was intense! My doctor came to check me and said “We’ll be ready to push in about 30 minutes” She came in not even 5 minutes later and said “Lets have this baby!” I couldn’t believe it was happening so quickly. I don’t know how many pushes I did, all I know is that my baby had developed a heart arrhythmia at some point during labor so they wanted her out quick. They used forceps during 2 of my pushes and I made them stop. It hurt so bad, and I was unable to focus on pushing. I looked my doctor square in the eyes and said “Take them out! I am not pushing with them in.” And she obliged. I said, “I will get her out quickly. I got this!”

It was at this point that I took control. Like I said, I could feel each contraction still. The pressure was intense. I stopped taking breaks in between pushing because my baby needed me. I just closed my eyes and treated it like track practice on the last rep….get to the finish line as fast as possible. And at 1:57pm on July 24, 2018 my princess was born! Of course I cried! She looked just like her big brother.

I felt like superwoman after. I felt like I could conquer anything and I still feel that way. Although the birth wasn’t complication free, it was better than a c-section and I had a successful VBAC! I was elated and grateful. I am grateful that God gave me my hearts desire to push out this baby girl.

So if you are giving birth soon, here is my advice to you:

• Own your labor! It is your body. If you don’t like something, speak up. Don’t think you have to do whatever it is they are suggesting. You are paying them.
• Create a plan but be flexible in case complications arise
• Submit that plan to God. Pray about it. Be honest with Him about your desires and your “why”
• Be confident! Growing a child then giving birth, no matter the method, is empowering.

You got this mamas & future mamas!

xoxo
Disa B.

Welcome our sweet baby girl: Danika Badillo