Tag Archives: Jesus

Doing It Anyway: Choosing Discipline Over Feelings

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Not long ago, my mom told me I should be a life coach or a motivational speaker.

I laughed. And immediately said, absolutely not.

Not because I don’t believe people can change, but because most people already know what they need to do. They just won’t do it. And that’s the part that would upset me. Not the lack of information, but the lack of obedience. Wasted potential. Wasted time. Their time and mine.

The truth is, information isn’t the problem. Obedience is.

Motivation Is a Feeling. Discipline Is a Decision.

Most people live their lives led by how they feel.

They don’t feel like working out, so they don’t.
They don’t feel like studying, so they don’t.
They don’t feel inspired, so they wait.

But feelings are unreliable. They shift with moods, seasons, stress, and circumstances. If you wait to feel ready, you’ll spend most of your life standing still.

Motivation is helpful. It gets you started. But discipline is what sustains you. Discipline is choosing to do what needs to be done even when the excitement is gone and the results aren’t immediate. I always say, “Motivation gets you there, but discipline KEEPS you there.”

Scripture reminds us that “the plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance” (Proverbs 21:5). Diligence isn’t emotional. It’s intentional.

When Feelings Are in Charge, Destruction Follows

Feelings don’t just derail goals. They’ve ruined marriages, friendships, and careers.

People didn’t wake up planning to have an affair, betray a friend, or disrespect their leadership. They felt lonely. They felt unappreciated. They felt justified. And instead of exercising discipline, they gave their feelings the final say.

Feelings make great indicators, but terrible leaders.

Discipline creates guardrails. It pauses you when something feels good but is wrong. It pushes you forward when something feels hard but is necessary. The Bible speaks to this when it says, “Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control” (Proverbs 25:28).

Discipline isn’t punishment. It’s protection. Practicing discipline in one area will help you be disciplined in all areas of your life.

Discipline Is Self-Respect

At its core, discipline is about integrity, especially with yourself.

Every time you break a promise you made to yourself, you reinforce the belief that you can’t trust you. Every time you quit when things get uncomfortable, you quietly tell yourself that your word doesn’t matter.

But every time you show up anyway, tired, unmotivated, unsure, you rebuild trust with yourself. You strengthen the part of you that knows you can be relied on.

Scripture says, “Whoever is faithful in little is faithful also in much” (Luke 16:10). Discipline in the small, unseen moments prepares you for bigger responsibility, bigger blessings, and bigger breakthroughs.

Three Questions to Ask Yourself

Before you blame circumstances, lack of motivation, or timing, ask yourself:

  1. Aren’t you tired of breaking the promises you made to yourself?
  2. If you only did what you felt like doing, would the life you want ever exist?
  3. What would change if quitting was no longer an option, only adjusting?

These questions aren’t meant to shame you. They’re meant to wake you up.

Last year you said you were going to get in the best shape of your life.
Last year you said you were going back to school.
Last year you said you were going to change your eating habits to fix your health issues.
Last year you said you would drink less.
Last year you said you were going to improve your skillset to improve your career.
Last year you said you would let go of toxic habits and adjust to be a better person.

Let’s make last year the last year you quit on yourself. Let’s make this year, THE YEAR.

The year you do it anyway. The year you don’t give up. The year you make yourself proud of you. The year you start chasing after the life you desire with full force even on the hard days…ESPECIALLY on the hard days. You owe it to you.

As January Ends, Don’t Quit

As the month comes to a close, the motivation that carried you into the new year may be fading. You may already be tempted to quit. To tell yourself you’ll start again “later.” This is the moment discipline is required. This is the moment growth begins. Scripture tells us, “Let us not grow weary of doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9).

Don’t quit. Keep going. Yes, you will have bad days. Yes, it won’t always go how you expected. Yes, life will throw curveballs. But, do it anyway. Cry through it, pray through it, crawl through it, just don’t give up. Slow down if you need to, but don’t quit.

If you have already thrown in the towel and convinced yourself that where you’re at is as good as it will get, start again. Adjust if you need to. But don’t walk away. It’s not too late. As long as there is breath in your lungs, you can always start again.

I want to leave you with some affirmations for this season:

  • I am disciplined even when I don’t feel motivated.
  • I keep the promises I make to myself.
  • I do what is required, not just what is comfortable.
  • My feelings do not control me. I choose obedience, consistency, and growth.
  • I am becoming the person my future requires.

 

❤️ Disa B.

Death to Superwoman

Posted in Christian, Family, Relationships, Self Worth by

Let me start off by saying that perfection is an illusion, and there is no such thing as balance. Some seasons, you’ll neglect certain things and parts of your life, and that is ok.

For years, I believed I had to be everything to everyone. The strong Black woman. The wife who holds her husband down. The mother who never misses a beat. The daughter, the sister, the friend, the professional; all done with a smile, no cracks showing.

I wore the cape proudly. But the cape got heavy.

I told myself rest was a luxury I hadn’t earned. That pausing was a sign of weakness. That if I didn’t push through, somehow my family would fall apart. I thought strength meant never stopping.

But eventually, I stopped anyway, because I had no choice. I was on the verge of a mental breakdown. Everything in my life seemed perfect, but the weight of trying to be perfect and show up for everyone and everything, every time was crushing me.

The Myth I Inherited

Being a Black woman, you inherit stories. Stories of women who endured, who carried, who made a way out of no way. That legacy is powerful, but it can also be suffocating.

I thought strength meant silence. I thought motherhood meant martyrdom. I thought being a wife meant meeting every need before acknowledging my own.

The truth is, no one asked me to do that. Not my husband. Not my children. I put those expectations on myself.

The Superwoman Complex

Part of it was the Superwoman complex, that deep-rooted belief that I should be able to carry it all. That no matter how heavy life gets, I can handle it without breaking. That I can juggle every responsibility, every role, and never drop a ball.

But here’s the truth: I am not Superwoman.

I am not meant to carry everything. And even if I could, why should I? Carrying it all left me tired, anxious, and stretched so thin that there was no space left for me.

Letting go of the Superwoman complex has been an act of freedom. It has meant admitting that I am human, not a superhero. It has meant learning to ask for help. It has meant setting boundaries. And it has meant allowing myself to put some things down without guilt.

The Sofa That Saved Me

One of my favorite places in the world is my family room sofa. In the middle of the day, I’ll grab a blanket, curl up, and take a nap. For years, I would’ve felt guilty about that, like I was slacking off or wasting time.

Now, I love those naps.

I love that my children see me resting. I love that my daughter especially sees me prioritizing my body, my peace, my need for pause. Because I don’t want her to grow up thinking womanhood means constant exhaustion. I want her to know that she can be strong and still rest. That she can be a nurturer and still say, “I need time for me.”

It’s not just about what I’m teaching her, it’s also about what I’m unlearning for myself. Burnout is not a badge of honor. It is a sign that you need rest or that you need to delegate some things to other people.

The Real Me

I used to think my family needed Superwoman. The woman who could work all day, cook dinner, clean the house, do the homework, keep the smiles going, and never stop moving.

But my husband and my kids? They don’t need a superhero. They need me.

They need the me who laughs so hard my stomach hurts. The me who cries when I feel overwhelmed. The me who can admit, “I can’t do it all today.” The me who lets herself rest on the sofa in the middle of the afternoon, trusting that the world won’t collapse if I step away. The me that is present not only physically, but mentally and emotionally. The one who is truly enjoying each moment instead of thinking about and planning the next.

They don’t need my cape. They need my presence.

Death to Superwoman

So here I am, saying it plainly: death to Superwoman. I am not a myth. I am not an endless well of strength. I am not a machine. I am a woman. A wife. A mother. A daughter of God. And that is more than enough.

I am laying down the cape and choosing to live fully in my humanity with all its softness, all its imperfections, and all its beauty.

Superwoman is dead. Disa is reborn.
And for the first time in a long time, I feel alive and free.


❤️ Disa B.

When Perfection Becomes a Prison

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Lately, with the help of my amazing therapist, I’ve realized just how much perfectionism has taken hold of my life. I set impossibly high expectations for myself as a wife, mom, friend, and professional, and when I inevitably fall short, I feel defeated. Without meaning to, I’ve projected those same expectations onto the people around me, constantly moving the goalpost so that nothing ever feels “good enough.” That weight isn’t fair for them to carry, and it isn’t fair for me either.

Perfectionism may look like ambition on the outside, but in reality, it’s a prison. It robs us of joy in the present moment because we’re too busy measuring ourselves against an impossible standard. The truth is, perfection was never meant to be our burden to bear.

For me, those unrealistic expectations stem from fear. Fear of being disappointed and fear of being a disappointment. But chasing perfection has only left me feeling unworthy and exhausted. I’m tired of presenting perfection on the the outside but battling the weight of it all on the inside. I’ve finally reached the point where I’m ready to lay that burden down. And if you’re tired of carrying it too, keep reading.

God Never Asked Me to Be Perfect

The Bible reminds me that my striving for flawlessness isn’t what God desires. Matthew 11:28-30 says:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Perfectionism is heavy. Jesus offers lightness. When I cling to perfection, I’m essentially telling God that His grace isn’t enough, that I still have to “earn” it by doing everything flawlessly. But His Word says otherwise.

High Expectations or Heavy Chains?

I’ve also realized how unfair it is when I hold others to my same impossible standards. Ephesians 4:2 gently reminds us:

“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”

Love doesn’t demand perfection; it extends patience, grace, and understanding. By expecting people to never disappoint me, I miss the beauty of grace-filled relationships.

Freedom in Grace

One verse that continues to encourage me is 2 Corinthians 12:9:

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

That flips perfectionism on its head. My weaknesses, the very things I try to hide or fix, are actually opportunities for God’s strength to shine through me.

Learning to Rest

Letting go of perfection doesn’t mean lowering my standards or abandoning excellence. It means shifting from striving to please everyone to resting in God’s perfect love. My worth isn’t measured by how well I perform at work, how flawless I am as a wife, mom, daughter, or friend. My worth is found in Christ alone, and the work was already finished on the cross. I don’t have to prove I’m worthy. I just am.

I just am. Whew. That truth stops me in my tracks. I am worthy because I am His.

When I stumble, He steadies me. When I fall short, His grace covers me. And when I feel like I have to hold everything together, He gently reminds me: He already does.

Final Encouragement

If you’re battling perfectionism like I am, take this as a gentle reminder:

  • You don’t have to do everything right to be loved.
  • God’s grace is bigger than your mistakes.
  • The pressure to be “perfect” is not from Him, it’s from the world (and often, from ourselves).

Instead of chasing perfection, let’s pursue peace. Instead of impossible expectations, let’s embrace grace. And instead of striving endlessly, let’s rest in the truth that we are already enough because of Christ.

Love,

Disa B.

God is More Than Able

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Hey Dee,

When my mom called me at 9 a.m. on a Tuesday, I immediately knew something was wrong by the sound of her voice.

“Hey Ma, what’s up?”

Then I heard my brother’s voice on the line too. And in that moment, my heart dropped. I knew something terrible had happened.

See, my oldest brother’s girlfriend had suffered a brain aneurysm just a couple of days before, and I thought they were calling with an update—maybe one we’d been dreading. But nothing prepared me for the words that came next.

“Your dad had a heart attack last night,” my mom said.

Pause. It felt like time itself stopped.

“…but he’s okay. He’s alive.”

All the feeling left my body in that moment. MY DAD had a heart attack?! How? Why? He’s athletic. He runs 5Ks like it’s nothing. This was not on my bingo card. I felt heartbroken, worried, fearful, and in complete shock. I didn’t know if I should cry or scream, so I did what I do best—I jumped into action.

“Where are y’all? What hospital? I’m gonna pick up the dog so y’all don’t have to worry about it. I’ll be at the hospital soon.”

But before I go further, let me rewind.

This blog is months in the making. My husband encouraged me to start writing again, especially because since January, God had been placing the song “More Than Able” by Maverick City Music on my heart over and over again. Each time I listened, He revealed something new. I honestly thought I’d be writing about faith on a macro level—how even when elections don’t go our way or when the world feels chaotic, God is still faithful. He still moves. He still changes situations.

I had no idea those revelations were preparing me for this. For the hardest week of my life.

But in true God fashion, He was getting me ready for such a time as this.

My life verse is Romans 8:28, and God continues to show me—again and again—that He’s working for my good even when I don’t see it, even when I don’t understand. That week, those lyrics became my lifeline. They held me together when everything else felt like it was falling apart.

Let me walk you through the five moments God used this song to speak directly to me.

⸻

1. “You are more than able. Who am I to deny what the Lord can do?”

The first time I saw my dad in his ICU room, he didn’t look like himself. His skin was so dark. His eyes were dull. Machines beeped around him, tracking vitals I didn’t fully understand. The man I’ve always known as strong, vibrant, full of jokes and life, was now fragile and weak. I felt helpless—but not hopeless.

I looked at him and quietly whispered this line: “You are more than able. Who am I to deny what the Lord can do?”

Because who am I to say that healing can’t happen? That miracles don’t still show up?

I refused to give fear the final word.

⸻

2. “Can you imagine with all of the faith in the room, what the Lord can do?”

We had faith. I had crazy faith. But I’ll never forget the nurse who looked at me with cautious eyes and said, “Hope for the best… but prepare for the worst.” I appreciated her honesty, but my spirit rejected that. Not out of denial—but because I knew what faith could do.

In that room, with my brother beside me and friends and family praying all over the country, I felt the atmosphere shift.

I imagined what would happen if we all just truly believed.

Can you imagine… what the Lord can do?

⸻

3. “It’s gonna happen, just let the Waymaker through. He’s gonna move.”

There was a moment I’ll never forget. I had stepped out into the bathroom, locked the door, and let the floodgates open. I cried so hard I was afraid someone would hear me, so I silently screamed—releasing the weight of fear, grief, and exhaustion.

Then I wiped my tears, walked back into my dad’s room while he was asleep, and played this song softly from my phone. I laid my hands on his chest and prayed over his body. I prayed in English. I prayed in tongues. I spoke life. I asked the Waymaker to move.

And I’m telling you—I felt the darkness leave that room. I felt a release. I felt peace.

The next morning, the doctors said he was improving fast. He was being moved out of the ICU.

⸻

4. “Anything is possible.”

The craziest part? He had another heart attack during that first ICU night.

The doctors didn’t know how he was still alive, still stable, still thriving.

But I did.

Because anything is possible with God.

He defies statistics. He breaks through human understanding.

He steps in when the situation seems irreversible and He reverses it.

He’s not just a healer. He’s the God of resurrection.

And we saw it firsthand.

⸻

5. “You’re not done with me yet. There’s so much more to the story. Just let the Lord come through.”

My dad is here. He’s recovering. He’s living.

And I believe with my whole heart that God’s not done with him yet.

There is so much more to his story.

There’s more life.

More laughter.

More milestones.

More memories to make.

And this moment, as terrifying as it was, reminded me just how real and present God is. He was never absent. He was never not working. He was always near, always able, and always writing a story bigger than we could imagine.

So if you’re walking through something right now—whether it’s fear, uncertainty, or heartbreak—I want you to hear me when I say this:

God is more than able. And He’s not done with you yet.

Let the Lord come through.

Faith Over Fear

Posted in Christian, pregnancy by

spiritoffear

Can I be honest with you all? I have been struggling a lot with fear lately. 2 Timothy 1:7 has been the scripture I have been holding on to. “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.”

This provides comfort to me. From the recent shootings and terror attacks to old friends dying in car accidents, fear has been tormenting me. Can I not go to the movies, go to church, drive down the street, or hop on an airplane without a high probability of dying?

From the looks of my social media accounts, I am not the only one who is struggling with fear. In my quiet time with the Lord, He reminded me that this type of fear does not come from Him. The enemy wants us to be fearful to live the life God has planned for us. If we are too afraid to drive down the street or hop on a plane, we won’t be effective spreading the Gospel. If we are afraid that a madman may shoot up our churches, we won’t go. The enemy is using fear to prevent Kingdom business from being done.

The Bible says that we overcome by the blood of the Lamb & the word of our testimony (Revelation 12:11). We can overcome fear by taking it to the feet of Jesus and by telling others about what we went through and how we overcame. Oftentimes, we feel ashamed or feel like we shouldn’t share certain things, but the Bible is clear. We have to share our testimonies in order to truly overcome.

So here is a list of few things that have almost crippled me with fear.

  • Pregnancy: Most of you do not know this, but I was told I had abnormal cells in my cervix that looked like cancer and they were growing fast. I had surgery to remove the portion of my cervix that was affected by these cells during the first year of my marriage and everything is great now, but after surgery, my doctor informed me that I may not be able to carry full term because my cervix could open any time because it is weaker now. He also let me know that I will probably never be able to have a vaginal birth. Being pregnant now, of course this is always on my mind. but I have to trust God. No matter what I feel, I know HE is in control. His plans are perfect.
  • Raising a black child in this world: With there seeming to be more and more innocent black people being killed at the hands of cops who are supposed to protect and serve, I am fearful of my child being caught up into something crazy just because the color of his skin. I am fearful of getting a phone call saying that my child died at the hands of a police officer because they “thought” he had a weapon, but he only had a pencil or some candy.
  • Having a husband who is a Police Officer: On the flip side of the bullet point above, my husband is in the final stretch of training to become a police officer. With so many people hating cops and thinking all cops are bad or crooked, I fear for his life. I am scared that some crazy person will kill him just because of his uniform. I lose sleep some nights over this.

These are real fears for me, but when I remember that this world is not my home…that I am only here for a little while, all fear goes out the window. I may have plans and dreams of growing old with my husband, but what if God doesn’t? Do I trust Him any less? Does it make Him a bad Father? I don’t think so. The Bible says, “How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog–it’s here a little while, then it’s gone” (James 4:14). When we remember the real reason we are here, to spread the Gospel & save souls, fear has to go out the window. When we cast our cares upon the Lord, we can’t continue to hold on to the fear. We have to trust God no matter what.

With that being said, if you are reading this and you haven’t accepted Jesus Christ as Lord & Savior of your life, today is the day. Tomorrow is not promised. The Bible says that if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Jesus from the dead, you will be saved (Romans 10:9). That’s all it takes. You don’t have to get right first. God makes you right. You don’t have to wait until Sunday morning worship, you may not make it to see Sunday. Your time is right now. Don’t let another day pass you by without making this decision.

My biggest fear is not sharing the Gospel, but keeping the Good News to myself, while people die and go to hell. Choosing Jesus was the best decision I ever made. I can’t force you to choose Him just as He doesn’t force you to choose Him, but I promise you won’t regret it if you do.

Fear tries to overtake your faith. Don’t let it. If you are currently struggling with fear, take it to Jesus. He can and will help you overcome. Trust Him. Faith > Fear.

xoxo
Disa B.

Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

Posted in Christian, Relationships, Self Worth by

 

Growing up, I had low self-esteem and a poor self-image. I didn’t like the way my nose was shaped or how my eyes looked.fearfully&wonderfullyI definitely did not like my hair. I desperately wanted to look like the girls on TV. I wanted to look in the mirror and see myself as beautiful instead of ugly. The older I got, the better I became at masking my low self-esteem with a false confidence I would pretend to have. I didn’t want people to know how I really saw myself, so I would portray myself as this cool, confident young woman who was so sure of herself and didn’t care what people thought of her. That was so far from the truth. On the inside, I was growing more insecure by the day. The only time I felt pretty was when I had a boyfriend. I let them determine how I saw myself. Whenever they would cheat on me and abuse me physically and/or mentally, I was back in a low, depressed state. I would immediately begin to see myself in a negative light. I would always believe I deserved to be mistreated because I felt I wasn’t good enough.  I would think, “If only I were prettier, he would treat me better…if only I had this or I had that, he would be faithful to me.” Eventually, I snapped out of that. Thank God! I fell to the feet of Jesus. He had been waiting on me for so long. He showed me my value. He showed me my worth. He showed me that I am beautiful, that I am made in His image. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. He showed me that my value, my worth, my esteem comes from Him, not from them.

If you are struggling with body image issues, low self-esteem, or low self-worth, please know and believe you are beautiful, worthy, and valuable. God says so, and He does not lie. You are made in His image. He loves you, and He cares for you. Go to Him, not to the fading things of this world.  Only He alone can change the way you see yourself, but YOU have to be willing. Jesus loves you, and so do I.

Remember: You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You were made in the image of God. If you have a poor view of yourself, you essentially have a poor view of God. Allow Him to change the way you view yourself. You are worth far more than rubies. Don’t let anyone else tell you differently.

xoxo Disa B.

Feeling Discouraged?

Posted in Christian, Self Worth, Uncategorized by

I know often times in life things don’t work out exactly how we wanted them to; our plans don’t pan out the way we expected. In those times, it is easy to get discouraged and easy to give up, but I want to urge you to not give up. Disappointment does not equal failure. Hearing a “no” does not mean you will never hear “yes”. If you give up now, you forfeit your promise. The enemy wants to steal, kill, and destroy. He wants to steal your joy and your hope. He wants to kill your dreams and passions. He wants to destroy the purpose God has for you. The enemy wants nothing more than to see you discouraged. To discourage means to dissuade or hinder; to deprive courage or confidence.  The enemy wants to take away your confidence in your purpose. He doesn’t want to see you fulfill the things God has destined for you. Just as he met Jesus in the wilderness to try to persuade Jesus that He didn’t need to fulfill the will of God after Jesus fasted for 40 days, the enemy wants to persuade you to not fulfill the will of God as well. He doesn’t want you to reach your promise land. He wants you to see closed doors as missed opportunities, not as provisions of God. He wants you to think you aren’t good enough, like you can’t fulfill your purpose, and that you don’t have the experience or resources needed to succeed. He will do anything to get you to quit. Discouragement is one of his tactics to get you to quit and unfortunately, a lot of us fall for it. But the good news is, we don’t have to.

discouragedJust as Jesus overcame the enemy’s tactics, so can we. All we have to do is fight back with the Word of God. That means we must first KNOW the Word and have it in our hearts. I would encourage you to memorize, study, and meditate on Scripture. It is the sword we use to fight back the enemy.

Knowing the Word of God also helps strengthen our faith and our confidence. There are thousands of promises in the Bible that still stand for us today and the Word of the Lord does not return void. If we remember these promises, we won’t believe the lies of the enemy when he tries to discourage us. God has promised you a future and a hope. His plans for you are good and not harmful. Don’t let your faith waiver because of your circumstances. Stand firm on the Word of God. Fight the enemy back. You already have the victory. You just have to believe it!

I pray this encouraged you. When you feel discouraged, pray. If you don’t know the words to say, just say Jesus. He will give you peace. He is the ultimate encourager. He will lift you up.

 

xoxo Disa B.

A Letter to the Lost Me

Posted in Christian, Relationships, Self Worth by

Dear Lost Me,

You are somebody. You have been hurt. You have been ridiculed. You have been mocked. You have been taken for granted. Your name has been drug through the mud, but you can overcome. You will overcome. Your worth isn’t in that man who says you think you’re too much. Truth is, you are too much. You are set at a price that he couldn’t afford so he would try to do anything to devalue u. You are worth far more than rubies, don’t let anyone tell you differently. You are worth more than that man who chokes you and makes you fear for your life. You don’t deserve to be treated that way. You deserve so much more. You are beautiful. Why do you think you’re not? Sure you’ve been used and abused but that doesn’t define you. You are a queen. Your worth isn’t found in those girls you thought were your friends. I know you let them into your world and you trusted them. They prayed against what you were praying for. Don’t let them hinder your ability to be a friend. They were really a wolf in sheep’s clothing, pretending to care. That’s not you though…don’t let that experience turn you into that. You are kind, caring and compassionate. You don’t have to be a tough girl all the time. Sure you’ve been used and abused but that doesn’t define you. You made the grades, you had the scholarships…but you still feel empty because you placed your value and your worth in that. Those things are great but that doesn’t define you. The clubbing and the alcohol don’t define you. You use it to escape from reality but when the buzz wears off and you wake up the next day and you’re back in reality, you still feel empty and broken. This is not your solution…Jesus is.

One day you will realize just how valuable you are because you will realize Whose you are and THAT defines you. You are the daughter of The King. You are to die for…Jesus showed you that 2,000+ years ago. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Your past isn’t your future. Your past, your pain, your tears, your experiences will become your testimony and it will touch the lives of those around you. It will save people and bring them to Christ the same way your pain brought you to the feet of Jesus. See there is purpose in your pain. You won’t be down always. I know you’re feeling depressed right now and alone but I promise you this…you are not alone. You may feel lonely but Jesus is there. He is there to pull you out of that gruesome pit of depression that’s trying to pull you in deeper. He is there. Reach out to Him. Let Him save you. Surrender it all. When you do, I promise you will feel better. You will be able to smile again…I mean truly smile. You will radiate from a joy that comes from within. ImageAnd one day, at the right time, God will bring you someone who knows your worth and is willing the pay the price for you. One day you will be a wife and he will show you what God’s love looks like in a man. The enemy will try to make you think that this is too good to be true, but remember God says nothing is too good for you. Remember you deserve to be treated like the queen you are. You are worth so much more than you could ever imagine and this man will show you that because God first showed him. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life…He will heal you. He will make you new. Let Him. Don’t abort the process before you get to your promise. It will be hard. But it will be worth it. And one day you will sit back and say…”God You are so faithful. You turned my misery into ministry. You turned my pain into joy. There were times I had given up on myself but You never did. Thank You Lord.”

xoxo

An Improved Me

Knowing God vs. Knowing Of God

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It is so easy for us to think we know someone based on what we’ve heard about them or learned about them through the experience’s of others, but we don’t really know them. We haven’t gotten to know them one on one. We haven’t built a relationship with them. Our friends or relatives might have a relationship with someone and they may share with us bits and pieces of that relationship but we don’t have a relationship of our own with that person. For example, I went to a rather large high school. We had around 1,000 people per graduating class. I did not know everyone. I knew of a lot of people just like a lot of people knew of me. On my track team alone, I didn’t really know everyone and I was captain. For college, I went to a smaller school. I knew everyone on my track team. I had a relationship with them all rather big or small…I knew them. I know some better than others because I spent more time with them, but I can say I know them all.  

A person who doesn’t know me but knew of me and was asked about me might respond and say something like “Oh yea, I’ve heard about her. She ran track right. She dated so & so and went to HBU right?” They are just saying things that they have heard about me from other people, where as a person who truly knows me would say something like “Oh yea Disa. That’s my girl. We talk/hang out all the time. The Lord has truly worked in her life…etc” They can say these things with confidence because they KNOW me. 

I feel like growing up and just living life, we hear people say “God is good.” We hear them say “God can make a way out of no way, He is the beginning and the end, alpha and omega.” We hear them say, “Jesus is real. He is good. He is redeemer. He is savior” And then we just go on and repeat these things because that is what we have heard others say, but we haven’t experienced His goodness for ourselves. We don’t know Him as our redeemer, our healer, our savior. 

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Jesus wants you to know Him. He wants you to have a deep, intimate relationship with you. He wants you to experience Him for yourself. I can blog, tweet, Facebook, and Instagram about how good the Lord is but that won’t save you. When you encounter Jesus for yourself, you won’t leave the same. You won’t be the same. I remember my mom always talking about how good God is but I never really understood it until I experienced His goodness for myself. Until I got to know Him. Now I don’t just know of God, I actually KNOW Him! I have my own relationship with Him. Through Jesus, I know Him as my friend, my redeemer, my healer, my savior, my comforter. He is my way maker, my door opener (and closer). He is my Lord! 

ImageHow do we get to know God and build a relationship with Him:

  1. Accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior! “If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your hear that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved” – Romans 10:9. In order to begin to have a relationship with God, we have to be saved. The only way to get to The Father is Through Jesus.  “Jesus told Him: ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me” – John 14:6. Once you truly accept Him as Lord of your life, you will begin to see a change in yourself. You will begin to start looking more like Him. The process isn’t always going to be easy, and it will sometimes hurt, but it is all for your good and it will be well worth it.  
  2. Pray Often: Prayer is how we communicate with God. The Bible says to “Pray continually” in 1 Thessalonians. Praying doesn’t have to be so elaborate and complicated. Talk to God just like you would talk to a confidant here on earth. Tell him your hurts. Tell him how you feel. He wants to know the depths of your soul. Yes, He is all knowing so even if you don’t tell Him, He knows but He wants to know that you trust Him. He wants you to humble yourself and admit that you can’t do this thing called life without Him. He wants you to come to Him. He says “Come to me all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest” (Matt 11:28)
  3. Read His Word: The Bible is God speaking to us. He gives us instruction and wisdom in His Word. It is living. It is relevant in today’s world. It shows His heart. It shows His plans. It shows Him. We can’t truly know God is we don’t know His word.The great thing about God is He is always there when we need him. He doesn’t ignore our text messages, he doesn’t forward our calls to voicemail. He is there in our time of need. He gives us thousands of promises in the Bible. But we must read it in order to know what they are. And the good thing about those promises and His word is that it never returns void (Isaiah 55:11). 

I pray that today you begin to know Christ for yourself and not through the experiences of others. I found God and began to really know Him at my lowest point. He saved me from depression, feelings of worthlessness, and so many other things. I know God as my healer because I have experienced it. I know Him as my redeemer because He redeemed me. I know Him as my savior because He died for me 2,000+ years ago and died on a cross for me so that I might have eternal life in heaven but also because there are times I could have died, times I shouldn’t have made it…yet He saved me! 

My prayer is that you begin to know God for yourself. Just like you spend time getting to know someone new, spend time with God. He wants to know the ins and outs of you. We will spend all day on the phone getting to know our newest crush but can’t spend 30 minutes with God. He wants a relationship with you. It will be the best relationship you have ever experienced. I can promise you that! 

Jesus loves you.

I love you.

xoxo Disa B.