To the “strong friend”: it is okay to admit that you’re not okay. That is a sign of strength.

If you don’t read anything else on this post, I want you to know that admitting your struggle and your hurt does not equate to you being weak. Strength is saying, “you know what? I’m hurting. And it’s okay. I will make it.” We all need somebody. No one can get through this life alone. Thinking that we can is a lie from the enemy.

The Bible says in James 5:16, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” Healing comes through confessing our struggles to others. Healing comes once we face what we are going through head on and admit it.

Today, you may be feeling like living your life is no longer worth it. You may be feeling alone and lonely. Like no one understands. You may be feeling like you’re isolated on an island and thinking you’re the only person experiencing what you’re going through. Even in the midst of those feelings, you may still be encouraging your friends and family to get them through their stuff. You may be carrying the burdens of others and don’t think you can carry theirs and yours much longer. Release it today my friend. Cast all your cares on the Lord for He cares for you. His burden is easy and his yoke is light. Give it to Him!

You are worthy. You are loved. You are strong. And in your weakness, He (Jesus) is strong for you.

This time last year, I was struggling. See, I’m typically the strong friend. People come to me for advice and wisdom, and I give it with no hesitation. I can quote scripture and encourage people. That is a gift of mine. I love to do it. But when it was time to encourage myself, I couldn’t do it. I never understood how people could take their own lives until suicide was looking like my only option, and I attempted it…twice.

My family and friends tried to be there for me, but I retreated. I isolated myself because I didn’t want them to see how hurt I really was. So when they would call and text me, I would make it seem like I was doing okay. That I was making it. That the days we’re getting easier. But the exact opposite was true. I was drowning and depression was swallowing me up. I was at rock bottom. My faith in God diminished. I didn’t want to believe in Him any longer. I never understood how when tragedy happens, people blame God and turn from Him until it happened to me.

But you see, healing began to take place for me when I turned back to God and told Him that I was angry at Him and confessed my hurt, out loud. That was hard. Saying it out loud. Time doesn’t heal all wounds. Jesus does. I tried to shut Him out. I ran from Him. I honestly lost all faith and trust in Him. But He never left me. For that, I‘m grateful. When I finally ran back to Him, healing began to take place. I began to have new strength. New perspective. Then, I got real and expressed it to a couple friends and my mom. See, as bad as I didn’t want to, I had to face it head on. Avoiding it…bottling it up on the inside was killing me slowly. But man there was so much freedom in confessing it. I didnt have to smile through it. I didnt have to pretend. I was free to live in my hurt for a moment. I was free to express my sadness and my anger and my disappointment. It felt good. It FEELS good. 

I can’t say that I’ve made it. To be honest, each day I’m still making it. I’m still recovering. I still have to renew my mind. I still have to cast down thoughts. Tears still form. But I’m still here. And the pain isn’t how it once was.

So, to the strong friend, seek help. Seek wise counsel. Seek a safe place to be vulnerable. You will be so glad you did. Then a year later, you will be able to look back and see how you made it through your toughest time. That is strength. ❤️

Xoxo
Disa B.